I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
tell me about the fingering
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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