so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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