Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She told me I should be a condom model.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
