ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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