Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
