Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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