I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
