We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
