Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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