Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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