is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
