her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
he shaved USA in his pubs
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize