Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize