in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize