That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Randomize
