What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
