Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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