VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
