you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
he shaved USA in his pubs
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
