i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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