vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I just want nice things and good sex
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
