discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
