A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
