I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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