Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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