she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
