how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
it glows. i had to have it.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
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