Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize