Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
