Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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