I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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