she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
