AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
