i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize