Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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