ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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