CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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