i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
two words: eviction party
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
