Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Randomize