Sry I called you an 8
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
