That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
