Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
