Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
