Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
