I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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