and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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