This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
