I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
