Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
How's work?
Spinning.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
