were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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