At least make sure they are 18
Why
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
